In Each Other's Care
A Guide to the Most Common Relationship Conflicts and How to Work Through Them
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In Each Other's Care
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Break the Cycle: A Comprehensive Guide to Overcome Chronic Relationship Struggles
Few things are more frustrating than repeating the same fight with your partner. Playing out the same disagreement about money, parenting, sex, or household chores may leave you exhausted, cut off from the person you want to feel close to. While conflict in any relationship is inevitable, healing is possible. With In Each Other's Care, Stan Tatkin shares a hands-on repair manual that will help you discover how arguments get triggered, why they keep happening, and what you can do to get better at communicating what you want without the drama.
Drawing on his vast experience as a couples therapist, Tatkin uses the concept of secure functioning—a two-person psychological system of teamwork, full collaboration, and cooperation based on fairness, justice, and mutual sensitivity. This form of unionizing “takes time to learn,” Tatkin says. “And still, the rewards are awesome and make the effort worthwhile. Secure functioning benefits you, your partner, your family, your friends, everything, and everyone.”
Throughout In Each Other’s Care, Tatkin offers targeted lessons, sample dialogues, and heartfelt wisdom. Through this life-changing practice, you will be able to:
• Identify the source of unhappiness in your relationship
• Learn techniques for preventing problems before they occur
• Heal the emotional wounds of the past
• Transform conflict and struggle into win-win outcomes
• Renew broken connections and return to intimacy
Whether you’ve been in a relationship for years or are just beginning the journey, In Each Other’s Care is a wonderfully supportive guide that will show you how to work through even the most contentious topics with compassion and respect.
批評家のレビュー
“Reading Stan Tatkin is like listening to your favorite wise uncle armed with the latest developments in brain research. Smart, practical, blessedly specific, In Each Other’s Care asks: What would our relationships be like if we remembered, even in stressful moments, that we are actually in a relationship? When we feel threatened, we lose each other and revert to I, me, mine—forgetting, that our very well-being depends on the emotional ecosystem we’re a part of. Stan reminds us that taking care of one another, of our union, is taking care of ourselves. He offers actionable tools, like how to speak up and care for your partner at the same time. This book is a revolution. It has the power to transform your relationship and your life.” —Terrence Real, New York Times bestselling author of Us and founder of the Relational Life Institute
“Since, as couples, we are ‘in each other’s care’ and since, according to the author, we are all difficult to live with, it makes sense that we need a guide to help us take care of each other. And that is what Stan Tatkin, a relationship scholar and seasoned therapist, has provided. If you find yourself in one or several of the conflict scenarios he has provided, you have a ready-to-hand guide for its resolution. If you do not find yourself there, the solution process applies anyway, and we encourage you to use it. We recommend this book to all couples for achieving their optimal care of each other.” —Harville Hendrix, PhD, and Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD, authors of Getting the Love You Want
“If your partnership needs a visit to the repair shop, read this book. With Tatkin’s wisdom and experience, your complaints may finally come to rest and you’ll be laughing together again. People in happy partnerships live over five years longer. Tatkin may even extend your life!” —Helen Fisher, PhD, author of Anatomy of Love and senior research fellow at the Kinsey Institute