It's not only you who is developing a child's brain. If you're struggling to get your children to dispute less or speak more properly... If you can't figure out how to get your kid to change before entering the front door, or how to keep him from getting to the top bunk, If you find it annoying that you always have to reiterate the same thing, like "Hurry! You're going to be late for school!" or if you need to get into another fight about sleep, homework, or screen time, If you have experienced any of these annoyances, you are not alone.

You know who you are. A guardian. A parent and a human. Choosing how to chastise our children is a difficult decision. It's what it is. This is how it occurs all too frequently. They did something wrong. We become outraged. They become irritated. Tears flow. (Sometimes the kids weep.)

It exhausts you. It makes me angry. The whole thing, including the estrangement, guilt, grief, shouting, and hurt feelings. After a particularly difficult talk with your kids, do you ever find yourself thinking, "Can't I do better than this?" I can control myself better, can't I be a better parent? Is it not possible for me to be disciplined in a way that lessens, not increases, chaos? You want the inappropriate behavior to stop, but you also want to respond in a way that values and fortifies your relationship with your children.

You want to create less drama, not more. You really can. The most important lesson to be learned from this book is that you may set hard boundaries and punish in a way that is both compassionate and kind. Stated differently, you are more than capable of. It is feasible to punish your kids in a way that avoids drama and conflict while valuing connections and respect. By doing this, you can support them in acquiring positive interpersonal skills and improve their ability to make deft choices, take into account the needs of others, and act in a way that will position them for long-term success and happiness.