A friend of mine told a story a few months ago that has stuck with me in that way that a story does. I keep seeing echoes of it everywhere. I see expressions and examples of the point he was making in the coaching that my clients need, in my own life and mindset, and in the stories I hear from the people around me.

He told a story about a family who came to him and said that another family had a terrible experience at their school. My friend was confused because he knew that family, and while they did experience a specific challenge, the end result of their journey was incredibly happy and content. He went for coffee with the family that he knew and gently asked some questions. “Why did you only tell the negative part of the story?” he said. “The part that created a bad impression for this other family, and why leave out the happy ending, where everything was resolved?”

“I don’t know.” Said his friend, a little sheepishly. “It’s just what came out of my mouth.”

In a world where words create reality for ourselves and the people around us, understanding what part of the story we are choosing to tell is the difference between creation and destruction; connection and alienation.

What you’ll learn in this episode about the story we tell:

• How it is a reflection of our self-concept and the beliefs we have about ourselves
• How it shows what lens we tend to take on circumstances
• How it impacts the health of our relationships, especially when we’re in a rut with someone in our lives
• The impact that the story we tell has on the ideas we’re trying to make real
• How to observe our story with compassion and non-judgment, so that we can actually make the changes we want to see
• Questions we can ask ourselves to make our story lens clear, and to question whether it’s the lens we actually want to have.

Mentioned in this episode

• Anthony Thomas and “A long way from the block”
• Nostalgia for now
• The Bloom Room

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

Zoe is in the middle of a conversation with her partner. She’s annoyed and frustrated and is reminded of a series of other things that she feels annoyed and frustrated about in her relationship. They’re all connected by the feeling of annoyance…like pulling on a string and finding all the examples connected to it. She wants to tell him about each and every one until…

All of the sudden she realizes something. The string connecting all of these annoying things is not actually him. Even though he’s there in each instance, HE is not actually the thread. SHE is. The thing that connects all of these instances of being annoyed is HER; the one feeling them. She’s the one experiencing all of these things as annoying. SHE is the common denominator, not her partner.

She doesn’t like feeling this way.

Her instinct is to tell him he’s responsible for ALL of it.

For all of the ways that he annoys her.

But once she realizes that she is actually the common thread, she pauses.

She remembers that describing the way she feels in detail is really a way of escaping the feeling. That it only makes the frustration bigger, and worse.

Describing it isn’t actually feeling it.

It’s running away from it.
And she’s not into running away.

So instead, she uses the practice.

Jose uses the practice when he realizes the eggshells he’s walking on aren’t her eggshells, they’re his own.

Sarah uses the practice instead of jumping into DOING during an anxiety ridden morning.

Jazelle uses the practice when the voices of a patriarchal upbringing make her doubt her ability to be a founder and CEO.

I do the practice first thing every morning, as much a ritual as brushing my teeth.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• The two tools that are my ride-or-die go-to’s
• Why breathing or taking a minute away from challenges isn’t enough
• How to turn down analytical thinking to create space for the Practice
• The three most important components of the Practice
• Questions to ask ourselves that unravel intolerable emotions
• Four times to apply the practice
• How to metabolize a feeling and transmute it into something that serves you

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

Have you ever needed a fresh perspective so badly, that you just started over instead? Maybe it was by getting a fresh relationship going, or getting into a fresh job or home setting, or starting your life over in a fresh new place.

No matter how many times we change our external setting, we know that eventually we’ll meet the same challenges there, too.

In today’s episode, we’ll learn the idea of giving ourselves a freshie every day. About treating our mental perspective, our belief in our ideas, relationships, and ultimately in ourselves as a discipline that requires as much consistency and attention as diet, exercise, communication, or even caring for a living thing that we’re responsible for.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why we look for external change to help us re-motivate.
• How hedonistic adaptation causes us to eventually meet the same challenges in new situations.
• How friendships, coaching relationships, and other support systems serve the purpose of freshening our belief in ourselves and our ideas, and why that’s not enough.
• Examples of how the moment we stop trying is the moment things stop working
• How we can use that reality to motivate us to believe in ourselves, our relationships, and our ideas day after day
• A “freshie” practice we can normalize and use daily to build the skill and resilience we'll need when things get hardest.
• Three examples of how we can support the fresh perspectives of the people around us, through the examples we set and the things we share.

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

We were camping in the mountains with a group of 20 kids and their parents, when the ground began to shake. The first things I noticed were quivering leaves on the trees around us, followed by a soft rumbling that can only mean one thing in SoCal….there’s an earthquake. The children had all kinds of reactions. Some were excited, some were curious. Some screamed and asked to be picked up. We soothed them, gathered them, and came together to find out what we could, to plan and to connect.

I’ve been in my share of earthquakes, having always lived in California. This one in particular though, is one that I will never forget. I know that the children who were there won’t either, simply because we were together. They were surrounded by adults who cared for them, processed with friends who were standing beside them, and told the story again and again with the group.

While the earthquake may have been the most dramatic moment of this camping trip, it was only a tiny example of many examples of belonging. From CEOs creating annual “Framily” traditions, to women’s groups that have lasted over a decade, I heard example after example of people creating belonging in the communities they’re a part of. This single effort, is at the heart of what drives us all.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• How every opportunity to increase belonging starts with a single idea
• Why unique opportunities for connection strengthen communities
• Examples of long-term friendship formats
• The value of longevity in group connection
• Two questions that can increase belonging in your own life

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

Have you ever stood behind someone in the grocery store thinking they should put the divider between your groceries and theirs?

Or thought someone should turn off their fanny pack music blasting down the hiking trail right behind you?

Have you ever thought someone was watching too much TV? Not spending enough time with the kids? Following too closely behind your car on the freeway?

Yeah, me too. We all have.

These are all examples of the “Manuals” that we are all walking around with, inside our heads.

A manual is an instruction guide that we have in our heads for how other people are supposed to behave in order for us to be happy. The really wild thing about this manual business is that although our brains tell us that everyone around us is supposed to be living up to the rules in our heads, we never show the manual to them.

We are holding them accountable to it…but they never get to see it.

Another wild thing about all of this is that the premise of our manuals is that we think we would be happier if someone else changes their behavior. This just isn’t true, or when it is, it’s true for a hedonistic hot minute.

This causes us a ton of suffering, because we’re handing over the power of our happiness to someone else. But we can learn to see the manual for what it is, and we can learn to let it go.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• How ridiculous manuals can be, via a pretty ridiculous morning story
• Examples of the manuals we have for people we don’t know, friends, and even our very closest relationships
• Why manuals suck your creative energy
• How different brains interpret the same interactions in oppositional ways
• The single best thing we can do to increase happiness for ourselves (spoiler: it has nothing to do with how young you look or how much money you make)
• A four step process to releasing your manuals for the people around you
• Choosing compatibility in friends and lovers makes manual work lighter
• How laughing at our own manuals for other people can help us let them go

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

Let’s go back to emotions 101. Your emotions ARE your superpower.

There are three ways that we naturally deal with them; we stuff them down, we act them out, and we buffer (put something else on top of them like work, sex, tv or scrolling, food or booze, or even thinking a lot!). All of those things make our feelings expand and deepen- like pushing a beach ball down underwater, so that eventually it pops out with a lot of force.

The only thing that actually works to move through a feeling, is to get curious, and allow the feeling to exist.

So that’s feelings 101.

In today’s episode, we’re going way beyond feelings 101. Today we’re talking about expanding the limitations of what emotions we’re capable of feeling, and willing to feel.

That’s what happens when we increase our emotional capacity.

Because here’s the deal.

Sometimes, we SIGN UP for increasing our emotional capacity.

We do that because we want to put ourselves out there in the world.

We have an idea we want to make real, a change we want to make in ourselves. We want to grow or expand. When you’re doing that, you’re on two parallel roads of growth.

In one lane, you’re taking new actions. But right there next to it. On the other parallel track, the other growth is happening. You’re expanding your capacity to feel.

What you’ll learn on today’s episode:

• The two new skills you’re building anytime you do something new and different
• Why expanding emotional capacity is essential to forward momentum
• The external signs that will tell you clearly when you need to expand your capacity to feel
• What the payoff is of doing the work to learn to process deeper, harder, darker emotions
• The one question that will reveal the capacity expansion that you need next

Mentioned on this episode:

• Your Feelings Are Your Superpower
• Be a Time Whisperer

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

When I thought of time management, I used to feel and think… ’Blahhh.’

‘That is NOT sexy.’

‘I am not wasting my time on that. I want to be here in the present.’

‘It’s so boring. It’ll melt my face off. I just won’t do it.’

Ironically, all of those things proved to be the opposite of what’s true.

As I became a time whisperer…I had time to do sexy stuff, like take care of myself and literally actually have time for a sex life. I had WAY more time to do the things that brought me joy. I became WAY more present for my life, and now?

I actually love planning out my week. I legit look forward to it now because I love all the stuff I’m putting in my calendar.

Just right now, the people I’m working with who are focused on time whispering range from a Family Medicine Doctor to the Director of a school. They are stay-at-home parents and C-level executive teams. They are musicians and sales managers. ALL of them have found freedom, joy and success from the skills they’re building in time management, and that’s just the handful that I’m currently supporting with this. I’ve literally helped hundreds of others make friends with their calendars, their lists, and start falling in love with the time they have and how they spend it.

But let’s get real. Being an excellent time manager does not sound sexy.

So, let’s be time whisperers. Let’s you and I develop the grace and decisiveness, the follow-through and the systems to make time our bestie.

In today’s episode, you’ll learn:

• How being a time whisperer gives you a mind like water
• Three productivity theorists whose books you can order right now to do a deep dive
• How using your calendar can be like appreciating really great art
• How to know what to do no matter where you are but still feel totally free
• The one hour a week that is more important to your life than any other period of time
• The three levels of time whispering skill you can build and how to learn them

Mentioned in this episode:

• David Allen and Getting Things Done
• Essentialism by Greg McKeown
• Deep Work by Cal Newport
• EP 118: Three Priority Tricks

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!

Have you ever gotten roasted or teased for things you were kind of surprised about?

Or what about this…have you ever been teased for saying something that you didn’t know was unique to you?

I’ve recently been told multiple times that a certain word that I say is a “Marie-ism”, and I had no idea. In friend groups, family text threads, the Bloom Room and more I’ve had people say “As Marie would say…Wegotchu.” This got my attention, of course, and it made me think about this word and why I use it.

The answer I found is that I LOVE this word.

I say it because it’s my philosophy of life.

Because it’s my purpose in life to help as many people feel the meaning that the apparently made up word “Wegotchu” means to me. I want to feel that way myself, as much as I can in my life. I want YOU to feel that way as much as possible.

So this episode is all about Wegotchu, because it’s a total Mind Bloomer.

If you are a recipient of the Wegotchu vibe, your mind will bloom.

And if you treat yourself with the Wegotchu vibe, you will be OKAY. no matter what goes down.

In this episode you’ll learn:

• Why the Wegotchu experience is a word to describe an actually known phenomenon called “the connection web”
• How applying Wegotchu to your physical body will help it heal
• How applying Wegotchu to your own life will make you more resilient
• Why responding to other people’s low moments and challenges with this approach brings out the highest in others
• How acts of service are absolutely reciprocal
• Why responding to vulnerability with an assertion of connection heals and connects

Wegotchu communicates that you are seen.

You are understood.

You are accepted at your most vulnerable.

And it communicates that we’re in the web, and there’s no falling here; because we’re in it together.

Wegotchu.

How to connect with Marie:

• On the Web | The Local Bloom
• Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
• All Things Marie on LinkTree

JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!