In this Part 2 episode of the Coming Out Late podcast, Robin continues her conversation with Samantha Fox, talking about sex and relationships as it pertains to our ever-growing community of newly-out, not-straight queer folx.

In this episode you will hear Robin and Samantha discuss . . .

• A very big part of our coming out process IS awakening to our own sexual desires, our sex drive and defining our own sensuality.
• The taboo of self-pleasuring, masterbation and why no one talks about it.
• Objectification: being the object of the male gaze.
• Is our outlook upon men determined by WHEN you came out? Are lifelong lesbians LESS likely to be objectified by men? Are their relationships with men different than women who come out late?
• The different emotional conditioning for men versus women.
• Sex was an obligation they did ‘for’ their husbands; it wasn’t something they liked, enjoyed or even wanted to do.
• What was wrong with me? Feeling ‘broken’ in our hetero relationships and in our marriages.
• Working through the cultural ‘learnings’ and ‘traumas’ to heal our perceived brokenness.
• NONE of us are ‘broken’. We are just deeply buried under layers and layers of cultural, societal, religious conditioning that needs to be undone; but NONE of us are broken.
• Have experiences so that you can “collect the data” about yourself and get to know WHO you are!
• ‘Lesbian Bed Death’ is NOT exclusive to just lesbians - it occurs in ALL unhealthy relationships.
• Get to know your own sex drive and sexual needs and be true to your needs.
• Communicate! Communicate! Communicate! Not doing so in your relationships is like taking a tourniquet to your relationship and cutting off the blood supply.
• “Fantasizing” is such a great way to get in touch with what you like.
• Dispelling the Myth: Lifelong lesbians *may* not be better at sex than we are.
• Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation for all the time, love and energy she pours into our Community. Any and all donations are deeply, deeply appreciated!! Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass

ONE-on-ONE PRIVATE COACHING w/ROBIN DOUGLASS

There is nothing like the comforting effects of two late bloomers talking about the process and journey of coming out later in life together; especially when one of them is a “been there, done that” Coming Out Late in Life Coach. Robin is now offering private one-on-one coaching for men and women who are in need of some support, compassionate conversations, guidance and accountability during this confusing time in our lives. For more information about her coaching services reach out to Robin at: Comingoutlater@gmail.com.

P.S. Robin will be offering small group coaching beginning January 2025.

In this episode of the Coming Out Late podcast, Robin invites back to the podcast Samantha Fox, to talk about sex and relationships as it pertains to our ever-growing community of newly-out, not-straight queer folx.

In this episode you will hear Robin and Samantha discuss . . .

• The coming out late journey is fraught with potholes, messy-middles, and a multitude of emotions. But, what about what happens AFTER you’re through the messy middle - what then?
• Post the messy-middle, we are still faced with dealing with feelings and ‘people’ when we begin to date women. Just because we’re now dating women doesn’t mean we are immune from ‘relationship challenges’ and no longer have to deal with ‘personalities’.
• Peeling back the layers of not only comphet, (compulsory heterosexuality), but also patriarchy, misogyny, and capitalism, to realize that most, if not ALL, of our beliefs and traditions and cultural ‘norms’ need to be reinspected by each of us - least of which is the concept of monogamous relationships; or, that there is just “one person” out-there for us; or that, once in a committed relationship, that it is ‘for life’ - it may not be.
• To be open to the possibility that being in a relationship is an opportunity to learn and grow from within - to heal our wounds and grow. And that once a relationship may have run-its-course, that perhaps it was an experience in our life to purposefully teach us a needed lesson. “Relationships” can, and possibly *should*, be looked upon as a beautiful string of experiences with all different kinds of people.
• How “expectations” are the death to every and all relationships and experiences. Let go of expectations and allow yourself to experience the joy and wonder of that particular moment, and then the next moment, and the next.
• Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation for all the time, love and energy she pours into our Community. Any and all donations are deeply, deeply appreciated!! Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass

ONE-on-ONE PRIVATE COACHING w/ROBIN DOUGLASS

There is nothing like the comforting effects of two late bloomers talking about the process and journey of coming out later in life together; especially when one of them is a “been there, done that” Coming Out Late in Life Coach. Robin is now offering private one-on-one coaching for men and women who are in need of some support, compassionate conversations, guidance and accountability during this confusing time in our lives. For more information about her coaching services reach out to Robin at: Comingoutlater@gmail.com.

SMALL GROUP COACHING COMING IN JANUARY 2025.
To be put on the list to receive information about the new Small Group Coaching Program, email Robin at: Comingoutlater@gmail.com.

In this Part 2 episode Robin continues the conversation with Chris of “The ABC’s of Coming Out Late” and covers the letter “B”. She and her partner Chris discuss the importance of this life skill, how we should use this life skill and gives real-life examples of this “B”-word in action!

Today, you’ll hear Robin cover things like:

• Setting boundaries is not easy because it can often feel very uncomfortable.
• How the technique of “the broken record” can be used to help us set boundaries.
• Being clear is kind and being unclear is unkind, (e.g., sharing a marital bed).
• How Chris & I have been navigating boundaries in OUR relationship lately.
• Finding the balance between being codependent and then being rational and reasonable.
• Boundaries need to be simple, yet firm, with a graceful, neutral tone.
• Wanna support your “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass

RESOURCES:

SUPPORT GROUPS:

MESSY MIDDLE MONDAYS: EVERY Monday, 75 mins; 8pm EST, Zoom, $5 pp each week via Buy Me A Coffee. Register each week using this link: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/165736

THE GENDER EXPANSIVE EDITION: EVERY Tuesday, 75 mins; 8pm EST, Zoom, $5pp each week via Buy Me A Coffee. Register each week using this link: https://buymeacoffee.com/robindouglass/e/253374

NOT-STRAIGHT SUPPORT GROUP: EVERY Wednesday, 75 mins; 12:30pm EST, Zoom, $5pp each week via Buy Me A Coffee. Register each week using this link: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass/e/93135

COMING OUT LATE RETREATS: The 2024 Coming Out Late Retreat season wrapped up with 3 nights and 4 days of gay fun and deep conversations in Traverse City, MI. Keep an eye and an ear out for when and where we’ll be retreating to in 2025. Thank you to ALL who attended this year! Please Note: Provincetown, MA: CANCELED.

PRIVATE 1:1 COACHING w/ROBIN DOUGLASS Struggling to make sense-of and manage this new aspect of your Coming Out Late life? It really does make a BIG difference to have someone like myself who ‘gets you’ and who has been through it. Email me at Comingoutlater@gmail.com and request my 1:1 Coaching Info Sheet.

SUPPORT ROBIN’S PODCAST: Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass

JOIN the COMING OUT LATE FACEBOOK GROUP: If you are AFAB, a transwoman, nonbinary, lesbian, androgynous, bi-, pan-, and have recently, or ARE coming out late in life - join us in my private facebook group, “Coming Out Late”. Here’s the link: www.facebook.com/groups/209443717714063/ .