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We meet Nick, a New York police officer who desperately wants to be a detective but keeps failing the test. He’s married to Audrey, a hairdresser who dreams of visiting Europe—a promise Nick made at their wedding but has yet to fulfill. After their 15th wedding anniversary dinner, Audrey calls him out on it, only for Nick to surprise her with the news that he’s actually booked the trip. (He totally hasn't—but sometimes you gotta spend thousands of dollars to keep up a lie.)

On the flight, Audrey meets billionaire Charles Cavendish, who invites her to a gathering aboard his family’s yacht. When Nick hears about this, he’s like, “No way. I have a whole thing planned.” But when that plan turns out to involve a packed tour bus, he gives in.

Aboard the yacht, Nick and Audrey meet quite the cast of characters: Malcolm Quince (Cavendish’s billionaire uncle), Suzi (Cavendish’s ex-fiancée and now Quince’s wife), Quince’s son Tobey, actress Grace Ballard, a colonel and his bodyguard, a rapper, and a race car driver.

Later that evening, Quince arrives and announces that Suzi—his new wife—will now be his sole heir, cutting everyone else out of the will. Naturally, this does not go over well. Just before the new will can be signed, the lights go out—and when they come back on, Quince is found stabbed through the heart.

Nick jumps into detective mode and tells everyone to stay on the yacht. That night, Tobey is found dead in what looks like a suicide.

When they arrive in Monte Carlo, a local investigator boards the yacht to question everyone. The other guests point fingers at the “random Americans.” The investigator tells Nick and Audrey he knows they’re guilty and promises to prove it.

At the Monaco Grand Prix, Nick and Audrey begin their own investigation to clear their names, interrogating the other guests.

That night, the colonel’s bodyguard lures them to his room and drops a bombshell: Quince once married the colonel’s fiancée while the colonel was in a coma. She later died in childbirth. Just as things get juicy, someone knocks. Nick and Audrey hide, and when they come out, the bodyguard has been shot—he dies before naming the killer.

Audrey is shaken when a news broadcast reveals that Nick isn’t really a detective. She storms off and is picked up by Cavendish, who urges her to leave Monte Carlo immediately.

Eventually, everyone winds up at a lake. Nick and Audrey reconcile and start to suspect that Cavendish and Suzi are romantically involved and conspiring to split Quince’s fortune. While fleeing a masked attacker with a blow dart, they run into Carlos, the race car driver. Suzi is killed with a dart, and Nick and Carlos chase the killer but lose them.

Nick and Audrey head to Quince’s mansion to confront Cavendish—only to find him poisoned.

They call the investigator and gather the remaining guests, but everyone seems to have an alibi. Nick and Audrey then reveal that Grace, the actress, is the mastermind. She’s actually the daughter who was believed to have died in childbirth. She convinced Tobey to kill their father and then killed him herself. When she tries to escape, Nick shoots her in the arm.

But the mystery isn’t over—Carlos is revealed to be the second killer, seeking revenge on Quince for the injuries that left his father disabled. Carlos takes the investigator hostage and tries to escape in a car, but Nick and Audrey stop him—with help from that overcrowded tour bus they skipped earlier.

In the aftermath, the investigator thanks them and offers to help Nick finally earn his promotion. The couple continues their European adventure.

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The movie kicks off with a ton of hot air balloons and, despite what the title wants you to believe, there’s not a cloud in sight.
Jared shows up to pilot one of the balloons so these two lovebirds can get engaged.

We then meet Brooklyn. She’s a business reporter who apparently has too much personality. Her boss tells her she has one more chance to tone it down or she’s fired. Her friend tells her about this hot air balloon fiesta in Albuquerque and suggests she cover it. Lucky for her, a colleague quits, and she gets to go.

Her boss calls Jared and asks if he’d be willing to let her reporter do a story on him—and stay with him. He agrees, as long as they don’t ask about his personal life. The boss then tells Brooklyn to absolutely dig into his personal life.

Turns out Brooklyn is afraid of heights and asks her videographer to go up for her—until she meets Jared and is immediately like, “hubba hubba.”
She spends the evening looking at his website. He spends the evening watching videos of her reporting.

They wake up at 3 a.m. to get to the festival. It doesn’t take long to find out Jared is pretty jaded when it comes to love, despite running romantic balloon rides. Could be because his fiancée left him for a rival balloonist. Brooklyn’s boss wants that scoop on jaded Jared.

The wind’s too strong to actually fly, so Jared and Brooklyn spend the day together, and she’s impressed by his passion for ballooning.
Another windy day, another grounded balloon—so he shows her around town instead.

Her boss keeps calling, demanding dirt on Jared’s personal life, but Brooklyn’s not giving anything up.

That night, they end up holding hands as they watch the glowing hot air balloons. Sparks are flying.
She spends the evening with Jared and his family, and he finally opens up about how his fiancée left him and kind of ruined love for him.

Brooklyn tells her friend Elise that she can’t do the story her boss wants. What she wants is to stop living in fear. Tomorrow... she’s going up in a balloon!

They take off, and she’s so thrilled she kisses him—and he kisses her back! They land hard and tip over, but she’s not even upset. He runs to pick up a necklace she liked earlier and gives it to her during the drone show. They almost kiss again.

Her boss calls about the story. She tells him she’s not doing it—but all he hears is her talking about the story, and he’s mad.

She tries to talk to Jared before she leaves, but he’s not having it. So she posts the segment—the story she wanted to tell—and it goes viral. She quits her job, and promptly gets a call from a New Mexico channel. She’s hired. So that’s nice.

Jared watches the story and realizes he done goofed. He rushes to the airport, apologizes for being a dummy, and she tells him she’s staying. They kiss—big time.

The movie ends with them going back up in a balloon. He proposes. She says yes. They kiss some more.

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Ben & Jamie are best friends. Like, besttttttt friends. They’ve been besties since 8th grade. Palmer is their third-best friend. Jamie has a boyfriend—also named Jamie. Claire is Ben’s girlfriend.

Both Jamie and Ben went off to college together, leaving their significant others behind in long-distance relationships. Ben’s girlfriend is still in high school—but don’t worry, she just had to repeat 1st grade. She’s... a lot.

Jamie is annoyed that her roommate really wants to be friends, but she reluctantly agrees to go to a party—and Ben tags along. Let’s just say... the party does not go well. They start to wonder if their long-distance relationships are ruining their lives. They mutually decide it’s time to break up with their significant others—on Wednesday, when they get home for Thanksgiving.

After an exam, they go to leave—but Ben’s car is missing. Turns out, Ben’s boyfriend took it to Colorado. So, they hop on a bus instead. The plan gets pushed back a bit, but it’s going to be fine.

“Unwritten” plays, and that’s the rest of the day.

They rope Palmer into helping. He brings the boyfriend and girlfriend over to his house, but gives them alcohol, and they sneak out drunk because they’re hungry. Palmer goes after them and ends up running into Coach Reese—the head football coach. When Reese asks what's going on, Palmer explains... and lets slip that tonight’s get-together was supposed to be a sort of coming out party.

To Palmer’s shock, Reese reveals that he’s also gay—and has chosen to live in small-town Ohio. Reese takes him to a bowling alley to meet his boyfriend and the queer bowling league.

Meanwhile, Jamie and Ben are stuck trying to find their missing boyfriend and girlfriend. They try sneaking into a bar where they think they might be—but that fails, and leads to an argument. Hurtful things are said, especially when Claire finds out that Ben is going to Copenhagen next semester.

Eventually, they learn their partners are at a house party. They head there, find them, and attempt to break up—but it doesn’t go smoothly. The fact that they're both breaking up at the exact same time makes Ben’s girlfriend suspicious. She tells them they should just get together already.

So Ben and Jamie have the talk: should they? They end up sharing a kiss—one that could be described as “big ones.” It's interrupted by the arrival of the fire department.

Finally—it’s Thanksgiving. Ben is watching When Harry Met Sally and realizes he has to talk to Jamie. He needs to get something off his chest: he doesn’t have romantic feelings for her, and the kiss didn’t do it for him.

Jamie is relieved—she felt the exact same way.

Ben heads to Europe. Six months later, he returns a day early to surprise Jamie—so they can dance together in a totally normal way... that two people who are just friends do.

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An obsessive fan kidnaps a former child star to live out the fantasy of having her character as a best friend.

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Eric Field hops on a train, heading back to Italy. Why? To find his 24-year-old daughter, Liv. Eric has a complicated relationship with Italy, so he’s not exactly thrilled to be there. And he’s even less thrilled to learn that his daughter is apparently trying to buy a villa.

Liv catches him up on what she’s been up to: she tutored English in Milan, nannied in Florence, worked harvesting olives, then came to this village for a wine festival—and fell in love. Eric’s like, “I thought you’d come over here for a little bit and then come back to Ohio.”

They walk into a coffee shop where Eric meets a woman who clearly strikes his fancy. He immediately starts unloading on her about how his daughter is being ripped off by the mayor, who’s trying to get her to buy some dumb house for one euro. Turns out, this woman is the mayor.

Liv explains to her dad that she wants to buy a place here to feel closer to her late mother, who was very proud of being Italian.

So the three of them go check out some dumpy houses. Apparently, the mayor, Francesca, is doing this one-euro housing program to help boost the village’s economy by bringing in new people. The first few houses are awful. But the last one? It’s amazing. The problem? It’s not technically on the list yet. Still, it’s clearly the one.

Eric goes out with the mayor for gelato to talk more about the house. This guy named Bernardo, who’s in charge of permits and such, is also there—and he’s not fond of the idea of a non-Italian buying property in the village. He’s worried they’ll change things.

As work begins on the house, Eric keeps trying to take over and pushes Liv to just renovate and sell it. But Liv stands her ground. Eric finds out Francesca has been widowed for five years—two years longer than he has.

There’s this guy named Giovanni, a chef who’s very into Liv, but she’s not feeling it. Eric, however, likes him and is super impressed with his food. That gets Eric thinking: the villa has an authentic brick pizza oven and chimney.

Eric invites everyone—including Francesca and Bernardo—to pitch the idea of turning the villa into a culinary school, which could help boost the local economy. He asks Giovanni to participate and encourages Liv to give him a shot.

Eric and Francesca go on what might be a date… or might not. But things are getting serious.

Meanwhile, Eric’s been gone for two months, and his employer tells him that the competition is trying to poach her. She’s considering the offer because she’s not sure Eric is ever coming back.

Later, Eric and Francesca go to a beach party—and end up kissing. They head back to her place. The sparks are FLYING. Eric starts to wonder if maybe he should just stay and be close to his daughter.

But then Liv drops a bomb—she has the opportunity to do a year-long interior design apprenticeship in Rome. Eric’s like, “That’s amazing!” And Liv says, “You should stay here and help run the villa!”

Things take a turn when Bernardo finds out Eric and Francesca are together, and he’s not happy. At the unveiling of the restored fresco in what will be the culinary school, Bernardo brings in the American Longos, who he claims are the rightful owners of the villa. In response, Eric offers to give the couple the villa—if they pay for the renovations.

Francesca isn’t about to give up without a fight. She investigates and discovers that the Longos are actually related to a different house in town, not this villa. She rushes to the train station to stop Eric just in time. He says he doesn’t want to leave, and she tells him, “You haven’t lost the villa. It’s all yours.”

Some time passes. They open the culinary school. And they dance the night away.

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The movie kicks off with big horses, big hats, and big fun! Cut to hotel employee Stella—well, so we think. She’s sneaking into a room for some mysterious reason. It looks like she’s wheeling in room service, but she’s shocked to discover someone is actually in the room. It’s Christian, and he’s confused because he didn’t order anything. Turns out, it’s not room service at all—Stella designed a hat that she’s trying to get in front of Christian’s mom, Rosalind, who is apparently a big deal.

Christian helps Stella sneak out when his mom unexpectedly returns, but she accidentally leaves the hat behind. Rosalind sees it, loves it, and decides she wants to wear it. Christian tells her that the woman who designed it had just dropped it off, then heads down to the lobby to tell Stella the good news—and invites her back up to meet his mom.

Rosalind is impressed and asks Stella to design a hat based on her outfit. Rosalind’s stylist is not a fan of Stella and is thrilled when Rosalind dislikes Stella’s first design. She even tells Stella to “bless her heart,” which Stella doesn’t realize is the sickest Southern burn. So it’s back to the drawing board—but this time, they’re doing a whole new look, dress and all.

Stella starts hanging out with Christian a lot. They strike a deal: he’ll help her navigate Kentucky high society so she can design the perfect hats, and she’ll use her farm experience to help train Christian’s nervous horse for the Louisville Derby. (Spoiler: all the horse really needed was a song.)

Then there’s this other dude, Davidson, who’s clearly into Stella—and Christian fricken hates this guy.

Meanwhile, Rosalind’s assistant, Hannah, is super jealous of how much Rosalind likes Stella. She starts acting out: trying to embarrass Stella at a party, telling Christian that Stella likes Davidson (so he starts giving her the cold shoulder), and even trying to convince Rosalind not to wear Stella’s hat. But Odette steps in and convinces Rosalind to wear it—and she wins the hat-off!

When Rosalind realizes Stella is missing, Hannah finally comes clean: she told Stella she wasn’t allowed to sit in the box. Christian rushes off to find Stella, and they make up.

Then it’s time for the big race… and they win! Christian and Stella finally share a kiss!

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The movie kicks off with—yep, you guessed it—a yule log. A woman named Dianne shows up and begins vacuuming the floor. There's a knock at the door, and it's another woman claiming her car broke down. Suddenly, her son invites himself in, and we see Dianne get pushed down in front of the camera. Then a masked man appears and comes after her. Just then, the video is paused, and we realize the police are watching the footage. Apparently, Dianne doesn’t make it—and she’s not the only one.

From what I gather, Dianne was cleaning the house for a group of renters who were about to arrive. And they do. All of them end up dead—except one: Zoe. But Zoe is not doing well. And Zoe knows the truth: it wasn’t a person that did this. Rather, it was a killer log that floats around and murders people.

Speaking of which, a police officer is watching more of the tape when he hears a noise from the evidence room. He goes to check it out—and it’s the yule log. He tries to fight back, but the yule log saws off his leg with a chainsaw and blows up the building with dynamite, destroying the tape.

Zoe tries to return to normal life, but she keeps seeing the log everywhere and ends up getting fired from her job. The police tell her the case is closed—they're convinced the masked man is the killer. Zoe insists, “No, it’s the log!” But no one believes her.

Her friend Jakester suggests they get away from it all and spend Christmas on an island. They get in the car—but Santa makes them crash into a tree. A tow truck driver shows up, and he’s a total hunk.

Zoe starts wandering around this small town, axe in hand, and notices things get oddly brighter when she enters Main Street. She keeps bumping into hunks, but she doesn’t have time for that. The first hunk is an influencer named Bo Regards, and he announces, “WE’RE GOING TO GET DINNER!” After the fourth hunk knocks her over, she yells for help. A hunky Christmas ornament shop owner comes to her rescue and brings her inside. She meets his kid and his Nana and learns that the guy—Bert—is a widower. She accidentally knocks over all the ornaments and tries to fix them, but then she gets a text from Bo about dinner plans. Turns out Bo has opened his own competing ornament shop. Unfortunate.

Meanwhile, the yule log is on its own adventure. It sneaks into the trunk of a family going camping and proceeds to brutally kill them all.

Bo agrees to let Zoe use his helicopter, but it leaves without her. As she walks back to town, Bert and his family pick her up and offer to let her stay with them. She opens up to Bert about what happened, and he’s like, “Don’t worry—I know just what you need.” He’s built a machine that helps people process trauma. And it works. Her life changes. She’s full of holiday cheer and no longer afraid of the yule log.

Zoe and Bert have a wonderful day together—blowing bubbles by the creek, sliding down a fire pole, etc. Everything seems great—until we see the yule log peeking around a corner.

But don’t worry—Santa shows up and captures it in a bag. He runs it through a wood chipper, then buries the pieces in a shallow grave and pours cement over it. Looks like the nightmare is finally over.

Except… one tiny wood strip escapes. It flies through the air and gives Nana a splinter.

They all go inside for dinner, and—don’t ask me why—Zoe opens the freezer and sees a mini version of Nana, who invites her inside. Zoe climbs in and shrinks down too. Her ex, Alex, is also in the freezer, working on his boxing skills. (I have no idea, man.)

The next day, Nana complains about her stomach—but I’m sure it’s nothing.

At Christmas dinner, chaos erupts. Nana starts vomiting all over the food and then starts choking. One of the Cards tries to give her the Heimlich when suddenly they’re stabbed by a giant tree branch. More branches burst from Nana until her head pops off—and the yule log crawls out from the head hole.

Nana Yule Log heads to the town square, where the Yule Log Festival is happening. She lights all the other yule logs on fire, and they begin attacking the townspeople.

She tracks Zoe and Bert back to his house, where they discover that the ashes of their loved ones are the only thing that can extinguish the fire.

They win! Zoe decides it’s best to leave town.

But in the end, she returns for the store’s grand re-opening—and kisses Bert.