What really happens when you cut ties with your own family?

In this episode, I’m joined by psychologist and author Karl Melvin, whose book Navigating Family Estrangement has been a lifeline for people trying to break free from toxic family systems. Together, we dive into the misunderstood world of family estrangement — exploring the deep grief, the guilt, the gaslighting, and the complex layers of going no contact.

We talk about:

• Why estrangement is sometimes the healthiest choice
• How society often sides with the abuser
• The pressure to forgive, reconcile, and “just move on”
• What healing can actually look like on the other side

Whether you’ve cut contact, are considering it, or are struggling to stay away, this conversation will help you feel seen, validated, and a little less alone.

Karl Melvin is an IACP (Irish Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists) accredited psychotherapist with an MA in Counselling and Psychotherapy. He has spent 14 years working with estranged adults of different perspectives, including adult sons and daughters, siblings and parents. He has spent several years training professionals on his own approach to understanding the complex reality of family estrangement in contemporary society and how to support clients through the various psychological, relational, and social challenges they face.

He has published one paper in the Family Journal, entitled The Changing Impact and Challenges of Familial Estrangement, and his first book, Navigating Family Estrangement, published by Routledge, is a practical guide for professionals and estranged adults and is available from all book sellers now.

Link to Book (There's sale on at the mo):

https://www.routledge.com/Navigating-Family-Estrangement-Helping-Adults-Understand-and-Manage-the-Challenges-of-Family-Estrangement/Melvin/p/book/9781032423067

Link to Workshop on Jun 5th (8 things everyone needs to know about family estrangement):

https://www.therapyacademy.ie/details/webinar/1673

Socials:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/karl-melvin-psychotherapist-ma-miacp-2a29679/

https://www.instagram.com/karl.melvin/

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In this deeply personal and vulnerable episode, Josh Connolly shares his journey to 13 years of sobriety. But this isn’t just a story about putting down the drink. It’s a story of survival, chaos, pain, and ultimately transformation.

Josh opens up about his early experiences with cannabis at age 12, the spiral into alcohol and hard drugs, and the chaos that followed — from blackouts and self-destruction to brushes with death. He recounts traumatic events, addiction-fueled madness, and his darkest moments, where the idea of escape felt like the only way out.

But this episode is more than just a retelling of a troubled past. It’s about healing. Josh reflects on how sobriety didn’t fix everything overnight, how emotional wounds ran deeper than the addiction itself, and how he learned to live with — and eventually love — himself.

Whether you’re struggling with addiction, supporting someone who is, or just curious about the raw reality of sobriety beyond the social media highlight reel, this episode is a must-listen.

🔹 Topics Covered:

• The raw reality of addiction — beyond the social media facade.
• The love affair with substances and the chaos that followed.
• The turning point — from suicidal despair to a life of service.
• The truth about sobriety — why it’s more than just quitting.
• Josh’s ongoing journey — the challenges and the gifts of 13 years sober.
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Listen now to hear the story behind the resilience.

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In the very first guest episode of Dysfunctional, I’m joined by writer and embodiment coach Leona Waller — and we go all in on the toxic side of self-improvement culture.

We explore how the wellness and personal development world can subtly (and not-so-subtly) feed the same control, shame and conformity that many of us grew up with. We talk about embodiment as an antidote — not the trendy version, but the real, messy, human kind. The kind that gets you out of your head, back into your body, and into a life that actually feels like yours.

We also dig into:

— Why gratitude lists can actually make things worse

— How capitalism hijacked healing

— Why being “zen” isn’t always the answer

— The problem with trying to meditate your trauma away

— And how embodiment can help you feel less crazy and more you

Leona Waller is a writer and facilitator helping people trust their own bodies and emotions more than Instagram wellness influencers. She’s the co-creator of The Body Knows, a newsletter and community using somatics and embodiment to help people stop optimizing life and start living it. With a background in neuroscience and emotional psychology, she creates spaces where people shed the shoulds and come home — to the power and joy that are their birthright.

Follow Leona’s work here:

🔗 The Body Knows on Substack

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Subscribe to Dysfunctional for raw, unfiltered conversations about healing, systems, and seeing clearly — because if you grew up in dysfunction, chances are, you’re still surrounded by it.

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Back from the bank holiday chaos with a so-called “bite-sized” episode (spoiler: it’s not). I’m checking in after a couple of messy, kid-mode weeks—reflecting on how quickly I spiral into my childlike state and how the lows still hit me hard, even after all these years.

Then I’m answering some of your deep, messy, crunchy questions. Everything from “Is it ever okay to yell at a toxic parent?” to “Do narcissists know what they’re doing?” to “Why does the wellness industry feel so f*cking toxic?”

I also share where this podcast is going: we’re pulling the curtain back on toxic and dysfunctional systems, family, society, politics, wellness culture, the lot. If you’ve got guest ideas, I want them.

This one’s raw, honest, a bit sweary, and definitely dysfunctional.

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You can’t co-parent with a toxic person and it’s time we said that out loud.

In this episode, I’m naming what so many people live through in silence: post-separation abuse, control through communication, smear campaigns, financial manipulation, and the emotional destruction caused by toxic exes who weaponise the system.

I start by reading a real-life UK court case where a mother was forced to promote contact with her abusive ex, despite proven findings of sexual and domestic abuse. From there, I dive deep into what it actually looks like to parent alongside someone who uses your child as a pawn to keep control of your life.

If you're in it you’re not crazy. You're not alone. And no, it’s not “just a difficult co-parenting situation.” It’s abuse.

I’ll talk you through the signs, the tactics they use, and most importantly: what you can do about it. From the myth of co-parenting to parallel parenting and grey rocking this one is for every parent still trying to find peace in the chaos.

Parenting communication tool mentioned in the episode - https://www.neutrily.com/

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Alright, here we go... In this episode, I’m diving into what I believe might just be the most important conversation we need to be having right now...how do we actually change the system?

I talk about how we’re all living in a society that mirrors the same abusive dynamics so many of us grew up with in our families. We’re divided, disconnected, and constantly fighting each other which just helps those in power stay exactly where they are.

This one’s about community. Real community. Not the online echo chambers where everyone has to agree to belong , I’m talking about old school, village-style connection, where we come together because we’re different, not in spite of it.

I unpack how we ended up so fragmented, why disagreement shouldn’t mean disconnection, and why true change will never happen if we keep shouting sideways instead of looking up.

It’s not a polished TED Talk but it's me, raw and thinking out loud. Crunchy in places. Sweary in others. But hopefully, real enough to get us thinking.

Let’s start a revolution. Together.

00:00 Introduction and Episode Theme

00:45 The Family System and Society

02:08 Community as a Solution

05:37 The Evolution of Community

12:50 Challenges in Modern Communities

22:16 The Power Imbalance in Society

31:16 Call to Action: Rebuilding Community

36:48 Conclusion and Future Plans

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In this 20th episode of Dysfunctional, I’m going in on everything that’s wrong with modern-day spirituality.

This isn’t an anti-spiritual rant — I have a deep spiritual life myself — but I’m calling out what I see far too often: bypassing disguised as healing, whitewashed practices stripped of their roots, and a new wave of spiritual dogma that looks more like performance than truth.

We’ll talk about the misuse of words like “Aho” and “Namaste,” the pressure to forgive even when it’s harmful, and how healing spaces are starting to feel more like exclusive clubs than grounded communities.

And most importantly, I’ll share what I believe true spirituality actually is — messy, embodied, honest, and deeply human.

If you’ve ever felt like you didn’t belong in modern spiritual spaces, this episode might explain why.

Let’s pull it apart together.

00:00 Introduction and Future Plans

01:03 Diving into New Age Spirituality

05:08 Spiritual Bypassing and Emotional Complexity

13:41 Cultural Appropriation in Spiritual Practices

26:56 Toxic Positivity and Dogma in Spirituality

31:01 Defining True Spirituality

34:29 Final Reflections and Call to Action

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Not my longest podcast ever but boy do I go in! I am passionate about this and challenging the abusive system is my main passion from now on

Tackling Systemic Issues: Conversations on Economic Inequality and Mental Health

In this episode, Josh Connolly dives deep into systemic issues, focusing on economic inequality, mental health, and societal structures. He reflects on Gary Stevenson's insights from the 'Steven Bartlett Podcast,' discussing how the system is rigged against the working class and the role of socioeconomic factors in mental health challenges. Josh also critiques the notion that individual effort alone can overcome systemic barriers and emphasizes the need for collective action and structural change. He underscores the importance of community, political awareness, and collective healing in challenging and potentially transforming the system.

00:00 Introduction and Purpose of the Podcast

00:26 Gary Stevenson and Economic Inequality

02:15 Mental Health and Systemic Issues

05:59 The Role of Power and Systemic Gaslighting

09:36 Critique of Individualistic Solutions

15:17 Simon Squibb's Reaction and Systemic Abuse

19:39 Economic Inequality and Hard Work

20:33 Challenging the Broken System

22:04 Historical Examples of Overcoming Oppression

26:25 The Role of Community in Healing

30:08 Systemic Gaslighting and Its Impact

32:24 Using Platforms for Change

35:38 Final Thoughts on Rebellion and Change

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