On Episode Nine, Matt continues being Home Alone 2: Lost in New York and targets the most famous New York M&M vendor. ⁠⁠Heather Edgley⁠⁠ joins us to get us thinking objectively!

Our Music: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Narcissist Cookbook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bug Hunter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --

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Challenge: "From the perspective of an inanimate object"

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BUG'S SONG

Title: Sammy

Lyrics:

I am Sensitive, I know

I get riled up at the smallest things

and start screaming at the top of my lungs

I am working on it

but my job is very stressful

Holy shit is that a frozen pizza?

Time to cry my eyes out,

out of my mind with self-doubt

doubt you could live without me

me? I defend you proudly

cause I'm your last protector

Hi, my name is Sammy, I'm your over-sensitive smoke detector

Any locality may by ordinance require that smoke alarms

be installed in any building containing one or more dwelling units

in accordance with the uniform statewide building code

in other words: you need me

I know you're all frustrated by my beeping

but where there's smoke, there's fire

so where there might be smoke there MIGHT be fire

ok I'll work on it

but you've cooked that egg for 20 seconds!!!

Time to cry my eyes out, out of my mind with self-doubt

doubt you could live without me, me? I defend you proudly

I am your last protector

Hi, my name is Sammy, I'm your over-sensitive smoke detector

They say when God opens a door

he must also open a door on the other side of the room

just one door will not stop me from yelling

That's just how airflow works

that's just a little physics tip for you

inside a song inside a music podcast

but to calm me down... I just need... HER

Celia, Celia, Twirl for me love

no concealing how I'm feeling when I watch from above

Celia, Celia, this never gets old

they've learned to turn you on first before they look at the stove

Celia, Celia... the Ceiling Fan

Celia, Celia... the Ceiling Fan

(They're making bacon and I can't even fake a beep-beep because of you, Celia)

(It may be my low battery that's talking they ain't changing me 'till Autumn, Oh Celia)

(Learn good habits, change those batteries on daylight saving time, for realia)

(and while you're at it change your air filters too, basic home maintenance, celia)

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MATT'S SONG

Title: No Visitors

Lyrics:

no one visits me here but you i wish i could give you a little something in return under the silt, rocks and pillars of breezeblocks i was a queen once just like you in a temple on top of a hill on the rim of the woods and you want ask me something i can tell yeah i used to tell them stories in the vapour choking air and they kept me round because i told them what they want to hear now i call it like i see it so they took my crown away and i don't talk that much anymore these days cause no one visits me here but you no one visits me here but you tell me what do you see in me nobody's looked at me like you look at me for apollo knows how long i thought i needed fable and theatre for you trust me much at all but i guess a temple is wherever you go to find your god and you want to ask me something i can tell you don't need to keep your worries to yourself

On Episode Eight, our heroes get mentally prepared for the long road ahead. Robert Evans from Behind The Bastards gives us a prompt that make us one with the road, and Matt moves to Times Square.

Our Music: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Narcissist Cookbook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bug Hunter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠⁠⁠

-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --

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Challenge: "Driving so long you become one with the road"

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BUG'S SONG

Title: On The Morning Commute

Lyrics:

On the Morning Commute

Sing along with the tune

I can throw on a podcast, a radio broadcast

all the things I can do on the morning commute

The beginning of the day is easy, I have a list of tasks to do

Get up, brush teeth, make toast, eat toast, make bed, don't eat bed

get dressed (required), comb hair (that one is optional)

plenty of structure...

and likewise my work day is a breeze

between meetings that should have been emails

and emails that protect me from meetings

I am stimulated all day, left and right and from every

corner of my cubicle, a beautiful hectic chaos that

keeps my mind racing and taken up with TODO's

but its that half hour in between...

that damn morning commute

Sing along with the tune

I can throw on a podcast, a radio broadcast

all the things I can do on the morning commute

You know, we don't use what scientists call our "Active" brain when we drive?

It's why we can hold conversations with passengers (or illegally as I found out, on cell phones)

or completely space out and realize 10 minutes and 12 miles down the road

And thats where you find me. Nowhere to run.

Can't even use my hands to defend myself

No amount of NPR or Arianna Grande can drown you out

no crosswords to keep my attention locked down, and you know it

You say "haha! your melatonin might've saved you last night, but you're

legally locked into conciousness now, 30 minutes locked in a Mazda

with nothing to properly stop ya, so you should buckle up bud, I've come here to haunt ya

So I snuck out last night and went to town like the Grinch of Suburbia

Climbing every traffic light and shaking the red and yellow glitter out of each one,

flipping every stop sign around to it's "Go-Side",

a couple well-place cones and now we have TWO northbound freeways and everyone else

going south can just use waze or something

Because I am getting this over with

I painted over all the lane dividers on the way to work

and had enough black paint leftover to paint a tunnel on a cliff as

a shortcut to shave off another seven minutes... funny, isn't it?

It took a drive to make me learn my limits

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MATT'S SONG

Title: White Line

Lyrics:

low fuel light's been on for days

i haven't seen another car

since i passed petrol station

must have a week or more

i punched in your address but

i don't think i remember you

objects in the mirror disappear as they slip out of view

i haven't stopped the car in so long i can't even tell

leave it long enough you turn in to somebody else

On Episode 6 we get tripped up on cantrips before Joshua David MG gives us a songwriting prompt that'll make you ask: Did they just write the songs of the summer??? If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠you can go to our Bandcamp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to pay-what-you-want to support us!

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Challenge: "Did I just write the song of the summer???"

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BUG'S SONG

Title: Loud and Clear

Lyrics:

You're playin' DJ on our road trip and my ears are going numb

It's taking every bit of patience not to mute it with my thumb

maybe pretend that it malfunctioned and I'll fix it when we stop

but then you say "this one's my favorite" and you crank the volume knob

Why do you like this stuff, I haven't got a clue

what made a middle class big city girl like only country tunes

you don't square dance in your Daisy Dukes or line up in your boots

and you you ain't ever seen the inside of a country town saloon

I've tried to give it all a chance, I promise you I did

but I can't tell when one song ends and when the next hit song begins

twenty minutes in... lets just call it what it is

every hit song of the summer sounds a little bit like this:

a big bar crowd sing-a-long

a four-chord kinda country song

where the chorus always mentions beer

and the title, the title hits loud and clear

Its always so repetitive, they've got nothing to say

every aspect is generic, every lyric feels cliché

I respect the men and women and the instruments they play

but the hacks that they are backing have put all their skills to waste

cause the stars are all so similar, so handsome, could it be

another well-connected white boy up and moved to Tennessee

Has a network out in Nashville, plays a chord or two or three

add a fourth and ride a horse and you can end up on TV singin'

But did you ever think...

[See website for remaining lyrics!]

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MATT'S SONG

Title: Comparing Yourself to a Sillhouette

Lyrics:

Amelia was born on a saturday night

in the heat of july in the heart of america

and while the city slept, her mother showed her the sky

and speckles of starlight settled on her eyes and little Amelia Earhart knew one day she would fly

No that's not what happened

Can someone tell me why we obsessively mythologise real people, real lives like this

Like no one truly exists unless they live between the lines

of a fairy story someone writes?

Is it not enough for someone just to have lived, you know?

And to have lived extraordinarily?

Amelia 'melia, please

Come back to earth some time

I'm dangling here by a wire

And it doesn't feel like flying.

Do you think jesus understood that it wasn't enough to be a good man?

To be wise and patient and kind?

Do you think he knew that in order for his message to outlive him he would have to be canonised, and to be canonised he would have to die before his time?

Or was that narrative thrust upon him

Against his will

By a disciple who loved the message more than the man

And who knew that humans don't trust humans

We trust gods

And so this all too human friend of his would have to

Whether he wanted to or not

Become a god

Or be forgotten

And here I am, trying to be the best version of me that I can

Comparing myself to these silhouettes who

In the way they're presented at least

Didn't exist

Thinking that because I don't have a narrative

Because you couldn't project my story on the screen

That somehow makes me less real

And the thing is

I don't think I'm accepting that

I think i'm trying to turn myself into a story

To see myself as I see them

As only a silhouette

On Episode 5, we record an episode in the same room for the FIRST TIME EVER. Come listen to us reminisce about the tour with PapaBug and rank all our favorite moments (Bug even reveals his favorite fan!!). Oh, and we write some songs, too!

Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠you can go to our Bandcamp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Narcissist Cookbook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bug Hunter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠⁠⁠ -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --

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Challenge: "Get Ranked"

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BUG'S SONG

Title: First and Second

Lyrics:

I wanna tell all my friends about you

to tell my mom, who will tell my dad

to find the best damn parts about this

and celebrate the things I have... but I can't

When I was kid at the dinner table

my parents would make us make a thankful list

the top 3 things about our day

and I was always just the worst at this

Some days it was simple but most days it was difficult

my disposition leaned a bit more pessimist than typical

its hard to get excited, like if life finds out I like it

I will lose it, yeah its stupid and its superstitious

So when you ask me the top 3 things

I love about this, I still freeze up

I probably look like a well-fed snake

as I choke so hard on that softball toss

I should just say "hell with it", maybe just embellish it

"your laugh, your eyes, your smile" but I know I'm barely sellin it

its hard to get excited, if life finds out I like it

I will lose it, yeah its stupid, I just wanna

tell all my friends about you

to tell my mom, who will tell my dad

to find the best damn parts about this

and celebrate the things I have... but I can't

Why am I like this?

Why can't I admit everything's going well

Why do I hide it?

Hide all my joy in this bone-colored shell

So I thought and I thought of my top 3 but its something I just couldn't do

so here's my top 2...

I'm tellin all my friends about you

I told my mom (who told my dad)

So here's the top 2 parts about this love

they're the first and second half

I'm tellin all my friends about you

you told your mom I'm not thar bad

So here's the top 2 parts about this love

they're the first and second half

the top 2 parts about this love

is the first and second, the first and second half

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MATT'S SONG

Title: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Lyrics:

I listed all my flaws in order
Starting from the least of them
The ones you might not even notice
Bedbugs scattering for cover when
the light goes on i just react,
it isn't evidence of sentience or anything like that

miseryguts
shut up inside my castle
overweight and
undersentimental
manic phases, chronic depression
what a shame that no one will ever...

I listed all my flaws in order
So you'd know what to expect
The ones that chafe your soul
Until the day your perfect patience starts to crack
i am a rock
i am an island
i'm the great pacific garbage patch

forget about
forgetting your birthday
i won't remember your first name
constantly expecting the worst
so i can say that i saw it coming

miseryguts
shut up inside my castle
overweight and
undersentimental
manic phases, chronic depression
what a shame that no one will miss him

It's Episode Three! We chat food (and pizza knives) with Jesse Gallaway and write two not-in-a-lifetime song demos!

Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠you can go to our Bandcamp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Narcissist Cookbook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Bug Hunter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠and our brand-new discord is here⁠⁠ and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends! -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW -- -----------------

Challenge: Not in this lifetime

----------------- BUG'S SONG Title: Crickets and Silence Lyrics:

I'm just a little guy, a little wooden guy a little puppet I know you know, you know how this story goes I was a little guy, a little wooden guy but I'm a real boy now and I am finding out that nothing could prepare me. I'm like Peter Parker's Pediatrician (in over my head and I admit it) with human flesh and skin and all the mess that comes with it I was young and dumb and now I'm stuck Dad, can you come pick me up?? I'm just a little guy, a little human guy applying bandages to manage, so damn easy to damage it that little wooden guy, that tough skinned kid could take a hit and keep running, this fragile man I'm becoming misses his 80-grit blanklet and the ocean right outside of my bedroom and making choices just to see where they led to but now adventures are a threat to every moment I get I look around for guidance, our bravest days behind us we'll never be so bold again, with mortal bones and fragile skin no I didn't expect to find this, it's like Willy Wonka's Wine Cellar yeah, I guess I should've known better should've known that growing up is forever but we can't go back I look around for guidance, our bravest days behind us we'll never be so bold again, with mortal bones and fragile skin I look around for guidance, but all I hear is crickets and silence

----------------- MATT'S SONG Title: The Nature of Forms Lyrics:

When the space between the spaces starts to strain When the puzzle pieces bend and don't quite fit in the same way When the molecules that make us lose their charge and break apart under the weight When the North star doesn't point north anymore When the constellations drift and leave us stranded on the shore When the suns have all gone supernova, freeze and then retreat into their cores If there is an after that comes after the before If after all of everything there's just a little something more And after all our time together we're both still on board What if plato had a point about ideals If the nature of a form is born in an elysian field And the parts of us that we call i could maybe one day recollide somewhere Then I will find you where ananke wound the spool At the source of all the rivers, at the end of all the worlds In the wreckage of the species, I will question every beast residing there If there is an after that comes after the before If there's some truth to all the stories I have mocked and sneered and scorned And after all our time together on this earth we're both still on board