In this episode of the Joy Lab podcast, we explore the complex emotions of envy and gratitude. We'll discuss how practicing gratitude can serve as a powerful antidote to the corrosive effects of envy, and delve into the evolutionary purpose and varieties of envy, including benign and malicious forms. We also take a quick (and hopefully helpful!) detour into the concept of counterfactual thinking and its role in both fueling and easing envy, with a focus on the use of mindfulness and gratitude to transform negative emotions into positive action. Best of all, we'll end with a really helpful way to reframe envy as a signal for self-care and gratitude.

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• More episodes on uncertainty:
• • Getting Comfy with Not Knowing (ep. 162)
  • Mental Health & The Male Hubris, Female Humility Effect (ep. 157)
  • Seeing the Goodness in Others, Yourself, & The World (ep. 66)
  • You Are That Vast Thing You See with Great Telescopes (ep. 18)
  • The Surprising Benefits of Not Knowing (ep. 16)
• Epstude, K., & Roese, N. J. (2008). The functional theory of counterfactual thinking. Personality and social psychology review : an official journal of the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, Inc, 12(2). Access here
• Hill, S. E., & Buss, D. M. (2008). The evolutionary psychology of envy. In R. H. Smith (Ed.), Envy: Theory and research (pp. 60–70). Oxford University Press. Access here.
• Mujcic, R. & Oswald, A. (2018). Is envy harmful to a society's psychological health and wellbeing? A longitudinal study of 18,000 adults. Social Science & Medicine, 198. Access here.
• Smith, R. & Kim, S. (2007). Comprehending Envy. Psychological Bulletin, 133. Access here.
• van de Ven, N. (2016). Envy and Its Consequences: Why It Is Useful to Distinguish between Benign and Malicious Envy. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 10(6). Access here.
• Xiang, Y., Chao, X., & Ye, Y. (2018). Effect of Gratitude on Benign and Malicious Envy: The Mediating Role of Social Support. Frontiers in Psychiatry. Access here.
• Xiang, Y., Dong, X., & Zhao, J. (2020). Effects of Envy on Depression: The Mediating Roles of Psychological Resilience and Social Support. Psychiatry investigation, 17(6). Access here.

Full transcript here.

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at helpline@nami.org. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

In this episode of the Joy Lab podcast, we explore Dr. Gabor Maté's fifth and final level of compassion: the compassion of possibility. We'll dig into how we can see beyond suffering and dysfunction to recognize the good within ourselves and others. This is a skill we can all practice and get better at. And importantly, this isn't some toxic positivity exercise. This is a skill that helps us see the whole picture, the full truth of whatever we're looking at. Seeing that full picture allows us to step into our wisdom and power so that we can make decisions that are more nourishing.

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Previous episodes for this series:
• • Part 1: Your ordinary human compassion (and what happens when you say something you wish you hadn't said) [Joy Lab ep. 177]
  • Part 2: The compassion of understanding & how to practice deep listening. [Joy Lab ep. 178]
  • Part 3: We're all just like the rest of us, aren't we? (the compassion of recognition) [Joy Lab ep. 179]
  • Part 4: See, Accept, & Move Beyond Past Pains (the compassion of truth) [Joy Lab ep. 180]
• Gabor Mate's website.

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at helpline@nami.org. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

The poet Rumi shared this wisdom: "Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, Your pain can become your greatest ally in your life's search for love and wisdom." The poetry of Rumi makes that process sound like a smooth and blissful journey. But, the reality is that the work of being open amidst tough stuff, seeing our suffering, accepting our pain, and moving on can be messy and difficult. AND, no matter how many times we try and fall short, it's still healing work. We'll dig into this journey throughout the episode, how we can be open to and see the truth of our pain, and how to apply compassion and practical steps to move beyond what might be holding us back.

Sources and Notes:

• Joy Lab Program: Take the next leap in your wellbeing journey with step-by-step practices to help you build and maintain the elements of joy in your life.
• Previous episodes for this series:
• • Part 1: Your ordinary human compassion (and what happens when you say something you wish you hadn't said) [Joy Lab ep. 177]
  • Part 2: The compassion of understanding & how to practice deep listening. [Joy Lab ep. 178]
  • Part 3: We're all just like the rest of us, aren't we? (the compassion of recognition) (Joy Lab ep. 179]
• Gabor Mate's website.

Please remember that this content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to provide medical advice and is not a replacement for advice and treatment from a medical professional. Please consult your doctor or other qualified health professional before beginning any diet change, supplement, or lifestyle program.

Please see our terms for more information.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call the NAMI HelpLine: 1-800-950-6264 available Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET. OR text "HelpLine" to 62640 or email NAMI at helpline@nami.org. Visit NAMI for more. You can also call or text SAMHSA at 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.