Listen to this definition of discouragement: "Discouragement is dissatisfaction with the past, distaste for the present, and distrust for the future."

That hit the mark for me because that is precisely what the discouragement in my marriage felt like. And it is a feeling many couples go through as they work on their marriage. A husband and wife can begin improving their marriage, taking steps to work things out, and still get discouraged. I see this all the time. I heard someone say the other day, "I just don't know if it's worth it." That's discouragement in a nutshell. In other words, the pain is too much. 

When my clients get discouraged, I understand it. Yes, they all show up discouraged, but no one expects to get discouraged as they take steps forward. But it happens, and it is natural. 

Let me tell you part of my personal experience seeking professional help for my marriage. After our first session, we were so angry we drove home in silence and remained that way for the rest of the evening. After a repeat of it at the second session, we decided it was better to go separately in the future. 

 It felt like the more we plowed the ground of our marriage, the angrier we got. Ironically, do you know, we rarely fought in my marriage? We both bottled everything up. So, in counseling, we dug all that stuff up. So many times, we were both discouraged and frustrated.

 We were learning new ways to build our communication and connection. We were learning to be vulnerable with our feelings. And then, we'd fall back into old patterns. Discouragement would whisper, "It will always be this way. It is never going to get better. You'll always be unhappy" So many times, I thought the pain wasn't worth it. Progress was so slow. I wanted it all better now!

Looking back, I wish I'd known what I know now. It would have made the times of discouragement easier. But, that experience has taught me how to help my clients through discouragement. 

In this episode, I'll give you 6 ways to manage your discouragement. 

For a complete transcript, go to http://reviveyourmidlifemarriage.com/87