🔥 Episode Summary:

In this laugh-out-loud yet surprisingly helpful episode, Roy “Al G” Free dives deep (but not deeper than 8 feet — OSHA says no) into the gritty world of pool tile cleaning. Whether you’re dealing with crusty calcium deposits, waterline slime, or mysterious gunk that may or may not be alive, this episode has got you covered.

From classic brushing and vinegar scrubs to soda blasting and bead bombing like you’re power-washing the Sistine Chapel, Roy explains it all — with a healthy dose of dad jokes, absurd humor, and just enough useful product knowledge to make your pool sparkle like it's on a dating app.

🧼 What You'll Learn:

• The traditional “tried-and-true” methods of tile cleaning (and why your grandma would approve)
• How to use vinegar, baking soda, and pumice without accidentally scrubbing a hole into the space-time continuum
• Why bead blasting sounds intense (and kind of is)
• How soda blasting differs (spoiler: it’s not the diet version)
• Tools & gadgets Roy recommends — including The Wall Whale, which sounds fake but absolutely isn’t
• Why chlorine and candlelight don’t mix
• How to tell if your tile needs cleaning or just a good cry

🛠️ Tools & Products Mentioned:

• The Wall Whale Classic Pool Brush
• Tile Scrubber with Quick Connect
• Blue Torrent 360° Brush
• Pumice Stone with Pole Adapter
• Poolife Tile Cleaner Rx
• Clemco Pool Pal Bead Blaster (for folks who like to clean aggressively)

💬 Quotable Moments:

🤪 Dad Joke of the Episode:

“Why did the pool tile call in sick?
Because it had a scaling issue.”

🔗 Links & Resources:

• Full tool list at cpoclass.com/tools
• Learn more about professional blasting methods at dustlessblasting.com
• Roy’s favorite brush? It’s the one that whales on algae. Available at yardandpool.com

Phosphates are everywhere—in your pool, your tap water, even your chemicals—and they’re feeding algae while making your chlorine work overtime. In this episode, we take a deep dive into what phosphates are, where they come from, why they matter, and how to get rid of them.

We’ll bust some myths, explain why test kits don’t tell the whole story, Oh—and yes, there are dad jokes. Because what’s a pool podcast without a little chlorine-soaked humor?

🔬 Topics Covered:

• What phosphates are (and why algae love them)
• Why phosphates increase chlorine demand
• The hidden phosphate sources in your pool:
  • Tap water
  • Leaves, pollen, soil, and swimmers
  • Certain pool chemicals
• The difference between orthophosphates, polyphosphates, and metaphosphates
• Why most test kits only tell part of the storyg
• Why “just add more chlorine” is not a real solution
• Real-world phosphate removal strategies
• Products that help reduce or eliminate phosphates
• Our favorite pool-related dad jokes (you’ve been warned)

🧴 Products & Tools Mentioned:

• PR-10,000 Phosphate Remover
• SC-1000 (phosphate-free scale/stain preventer)
• Natural Chemistry Pool Perfect
• Taylor K-1106 Phosphate Test Kit
• Clorox Pool&Spa Phosphate Remover
• And more available through AquaTech, Walmart, Amazon, and professional suppliers

🧠 Key Takeaway:

You can’t stop phosphates from getting in your pool—but you can kick them out. If you want predictable water and fewer green pool disasters, phosphate removal isn’t optional—it’s smart.

🤣 Dad Jokes of the Day:

• What do you call a pool tech who never removes phosphates?
  Algae’s favorite person.
• Why did the pool water go to therapy?
  Because it had too many underlying issues—and phosphates were just the surface tension.

In this episode of Pool School, host Roy "Al G." Free dives headfirst into the sparkling world of borates — what they are, why you need them, and how to properly add borax to your pool water. Roy walks you through dosing tips, balancing pH and alkalinity with muriatic acid, and explains how borates help stabilize pH, stretch chlorine supply, reduce UV degradation, minimize scaling, and even make your pool feel silky-smooth. Plus, he dishes out a healthy serving of lame dad jokes along the way. (You’ve been warned.)

Whether you're a new pool owner or a seasoned pro, this episode is packed with practical advice, chemistry insights, and laughs to keep your water (and your mood) crystal clear.

Topics Covered:

• Why pH drifts upward in pools — and how borates put the brakes on it
• How to use borax to establish a 50 ppm borate level
• Why you must add muriatic acid after borax to rebalance pH and alkalinity
• How borates act as an algaestat, helping chlorine last longer
• Borates’ bonus role in protecting chlorine from solar UV degradation
• How borates reduce calcium scaling and extend equipment life
• Making your pool water feel softer and more luxurious
• Why borates are a set-it-and-forget-it solution (no constant re-adding needed)
• Pet safety considerations when using borates
• Dad jokes so bad they’re almost good

Key Takeaways:

• Dosage Guide: Add 2.5 pounds of borax per 1,000 gallons to achieve ~50 ppm borate
• Acid Balance: Add ~12 ounces of muriatic acid for every 2.5 pounds of borax
• Testing: Always test and adjust pH and Total Alkalinity after additions
• Maintenance: Only re-dose after significant water loss (splash-out, backwashing, leaks, draining)

Memorable Quotes:

Dad Joke Highlights:

• Why did the pool water feel depressed? Because it had low self-‘steam.’
• What’s a pool’s favorite type of music? Anything with a ‘current’ beat.
• Why did the chlorine break up with the algaecide? Too clingy.

Links Mentioned:

• CDC Pool Chemical Safety Guidelines
• Detailed Borate Chemistry Resource (external)

Connect with Us:

• Subscribe to Pool School Podcast wherever you listen!
• Leave a review if you enjoyed today's dive into the science of borates.
• Got pool questions or joke submissions for Roy? Email us at: poolschoolpodcast@email.com
• Follow us on Instagram: @PoolSchoolPodcast