In this episode, EG dives into the worst questions survivors get asked, and why so many of them miss the mark. From the straight-up harmful to the shockingly common, she unpacks the assumptions behind questions like “What were you wearing?” and “Are you sure that’s what happened?” and talks about how curiosity, concern, or even good intentions can still cause harm when we’re not being mindful.

She shares her own experiences, reflections from listeners, and a few actually helpful things you can say instead. Whether you're a survivor who’s felt dismissed or an ally who wants to do better, this episode is both a call-in and a call-out.

If you've ever been on the receiving end of a “but why didn’t you fight back?” or wondered what not to say to someone who’s been through trauma, this one’s for you.

Trigger Warning: This podcast discusses sexual violence. See the episode description for more information. Please take care of yourself when listening.

Lux Resources is a North Carolina-based 501(c)3 nonprofit that supports survivors of sexual violence through providing legal resources. Survivors can access resources and legal aid for free on our website, www.luxresources.org.

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