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A woman has made a new exciting friend! But this friend ditches her other friends and treats them as disposable. Is the caller next? Here's the kind of pragmatic question and answer you've come to expect from the Savage Lovecast: Is it safe to douche with non-potable water? On the Magnum, folks have been asking for a menopause expert for a while now, and we've got her. Dr. Stacy De-Lin has been a proud member of the Planned Parenthood team since 2013. She gives us the basics on peri-menopause, menopause, and how to mitigate the negatives. Women have been chronically under-treated, and there are medications that can help. And, a man living in New Zealand is dating a guy in an open, long-distance relationship. The boyfriend lives in a repressive country where he can't safely be out. The caller enjoys their low stakes, open relationship, but wonders if he should invite him to live together in New Zealand to help him to get a visa and escape. Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From omni-amory, to monogamy, kink to asexuality, and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since disco made it's debut.