In this episode of The Anxiety Society podcast, Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale and Cali Werner dive into the pervasive issue of people-pleasing. With personal stories and professional insight, they explore the impact of prioritizing others' needs over your own and the internal conflict it creates. They offer practical strategies for recognizing when you're caught in the people-pleasing trap and discuss how setting healthy boundaries can preserve your energy, strengthen your relationships, and protect your sense of self. Whether you’re a “yes” person or find yourself avoiding conflict at all costs, this episode reveals how to honor your needs without guilt.

Key Points:

- [0:01] - Introduction to People-Pleasing

Dr. Elizabeth and Cali introduce the topic and discuss how people-pleasing often results from anxiety and a desire to avoid conflict.

- [5:20] - The Catch-22 of Social Media

They examine the common scenario of withholding moments from social media out of fear of upsetting others and the guilt that follows.

- [12:45] - Boundaries and Self-Awareness

Insight on the need for boundaries, particularly with close family and friends, and recognizing the warning signs of overextending yourself.

- [24:15] - How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt

Cali shares practical steps for setting boundaries empathetically, emphasizing the power of open communication.

- [34:30] - Why People-Pleasing Hurts Self-Identity

The hosts explore how over-accommodating can erode your sense of self and lead to resentment and burnout.

- [42:00] - Taking Back Your Time

Dr. Elizabeth discusses time as a precious resource, advocating for mindful choices that reflect your values over social obligations.

Quotable Moments:

- [0:02:02] - "I often say I don't want feedback right now. But then I wonder, do I want to improve or just feel comfortable?" — Cali Werner

- [12:10] - "People-pleasing keeps you stuck. It's not just exhausting; it chips away at who you really are." — Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale

- [42:30] - "The most valuable gift you have is your time. Spend it on what fulfills you, not just what fills others' expectations." — Cali Werner

Links Mentioned:

• Anxiety Society Podcast Website: https://AnxietySocietyPodcast.com

If people-pleasing is holding you back, it’s time to recognize how it impacts your well-being and reclaim your sense of self. Embrace this opportunity to set boundaries and make choices that reflect your true values. Visit the podcast website to submit questions or join the community on Instagram. Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review to support the show and reach others on similar journeys.

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