"If you shove that emotion down and push it away, it waits for you and, in fact it accumulates... it's getting ready to come back at you so it will be acknowledged." ~ Niels Petersen

Niels is a polymath with an engineering background. He has worked as an engineer, brewer, ski designer, sailor, math teacher, rigger, book editor, and more. His current focus is on mental health and addiction recovery. His exploration in that area has taken him into men's work and shadow work. Niels has suffered from chronic pain since a nerve injury in 2009, and through research and experimentation on his own body, he has been able to transform his experience of pain and regain an able-bodied lifestyle. He believes that chronic pain, mental health and addiction can share a common root, and that doing the recovery work can be so beautiful an experience that a person can become grateful for the injury in the first place.

Music courtesy of Aaron Handford.

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"You can do masculinity howerver you want to do it. But, it's about getting the people around you to be alright with it, to be on board with it, and having the difficult conversations with them.... because that's the thing that holds us in these really hard roles: the people around us."

~ Oliver

Oliver is a Psychology student at the University of Victoria and a practicing Clinical Hypnotherapist. His training comes from various sources: college, university, and private classes. He has been working in clinics as a support person for over 10 years and continues to develop his compassionate listening skills. He is a passionate reader of many topics: philosophy, political science, psychology, and sociology. His training includes clinical hypnotherapy, reflexology, and aromatherapy. His active studies include Co-regulation and self regulation strategies; boundaries; intersectionality; gender studies; attachment; post traumatic stress disorder; and trauma informed care. Oliver’s life experiences have given him skills in; LGBTQA+ issues; borderline personality disorder; diverse-abilities; neuro-divergence; somatics; and poly-vagal theory.

Image: Dr Alan Hart, pioneering radiologist and epidemiologist, and transman.

Music courtesy of Aaron Handford.

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"When movement and dance isn't happening, what's left? Are we sitting around at home or at a coffee shop acting as talking heads on top of bodies that have lost the ability to be at ease?.....

The path towards being whole beings— not just whole men— is to include movement."

~ David Yates

An internationally known musician, teacher, performer and dancer, for over twenty years David has been offering liberating and transforming experiences through his workshops and lessons. For the past four years he has also facilitated non-violence workshops for teen boys. As a student of orthobionomy, he has been led to explore more about Somatics and the deeper layers of the mind-body relationship.

You can find more of David's work at Breathwood.

Photo by Marilyn Grubb 

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For this episode I'm joined by a very dear friend, the wonderful Van Connor: London-based film critic and all-around pop culture aficionado.

We get to chatting about male role models in film and television media, the changing personas of super heroes, action heroes, James Bond, men's sexuality on screen, and how media influences the way men relate to themselves.

As well as working as a film critic for BBC Radio and talkRADIO, Van also hosts OffScreen - the self-proclaimed “ultimate seven day movie guide” - every Friday on podcast platforms and is the writer and creator of animated film review web series Memovies.

http://pod.link/OffScreen

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_B9sykGmBZn35DF061bI6A

music courtesy of Aaron Handford

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"Reclaiming your birthright to your full sexual pleasure is a revolutionary act."

~ Devi Ward Erickson

Tantra educator Devi Ward Erickson joins me to talk about supporting men's sexuality. What traumas do men hold from childhood around their sexual expression, how do these impact our relationships, how can men overcome these, and what can those of us who have sexual relationships with men do to support them?

This conversation covers a wide range of topics, from circumcision to somatic dissassociation, from the relationship between trauma and sexual predation, to the possibilities for a new kind of sensual masculine sexuality.

Devi Ward Erickson is a Tantra Expert, Sex Coach, an ACS Certified Sexologist and the Founder of The Institute of Authentic Tantra Education.

As a trusted and sought after Tantra expert and Sex Coach, Devi has had the privilege and honor of witnessing the profound healing that occurs for women, men, and couples when sexuality is honored as sacred and practiced with awareness, compassion, and loving-kindness. She specializes in using Tantra and “pleasure as medicine” to awaken more connection, passion, and inner bliss in every area of life.

Devi has been teaching meditation and personal growth workshops since 2000 and has devoted her entire adult life to studying the “essence” that infuses all of life through meditation, Tibetan Tantra, Sensual Dance, and Compassionate Communication.

https://deviwardtantra.com/

https://www.authentictantra.com/

Cover image: still from Flight of the Conchords song, "Business Time".

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In this episode I'm joined by Tanille and Sheldon, two of the people behind the Reimagining Masculinities Conference in Victoria, BC. We chat about what the healthy masculine role model of the future might be, accessing emotions, and the importance of not doing this work in isolation from one another.

Tanille Geib is a Lover of Humans. She is an intimacy coach & coordinator, sexuality educator & curriculum developer, advocate, community leader, creative producer, and artist. In the past 5 years she has educated and worked with over 4000 people on healthy sexuality and relationships. Currently she is known as Victoria’s Consent Captain where she supports events to create safer spaces and educate communities on the nuances of consent. To find out more about her work, passions, and upcoming events check out her website: www.tanillegeib.ca

Sheldon Kitzul is a Leadership Coach, Social Worker, and Educator. His work provides inspiration for clients through energy, insight, and enthusiasm, and is centred on evidence-based practice and response-based principles. He works from a place where it is evident that sexualized violence is, in our current social malaise, covertly taught as acceptable to boys and girls. As many others have expressed, sexualized violence is a men’s issue and as such, he works toward re-educating boys and men to step out of gendered boxes and put a stop to violence in every form. 

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In this episode I sit down with my friend Khan. His journey is an inspiring one. Our conversation explored the expectations of masculinity in Islamic cultures, the liberating power of rave culture and electronic dance music, to the transformation potential of burlesque.

Khan has been a community builder and facilitator in the Victoria polyamorous community for over 5 years, and cares about supporting and welcoming people into this community. He is passionate about supporting social justice, consent education and alternative relationship models. Khan is also a passionate and professional Software Engineer, and on his time off, a Photographer, Burlesque dancer and an EDM DJ.

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"We have this culture that says there's something really wrong with feelings... Starting to feel, you can direct your anger, you can use your sadness to deeply connect with someone. Feelings are one of the greatest gifts we have as human beings, they are the house of intuition, and to not have access to them is to be limited in our humanity."

~ Devin Gleeson.

In this episode I'm talking to two men who live and breathe something called 'men's work'. I know both of these men through different communities that practice Zegg Forum, a community vulnerability ritual, and our conversation covers a lot of ground on men's work with emotions, vulnerability, and the incredible impact this has on men's relationships to themselves, and the others in their lives.

James Bell helps people get unstuck in their lives using a combination of coaching, deep breathing and bodywork. He has also been involved in mens' work as a member of the Samurai Brotherhood for the last 2 years. You can find out more about him here www.ourhealingroom.com

Devin Gleeson is a personal growth and purpose coach who helps clients discover and pursue the work and lives closest to their hearts. During the last several years, he’s immersed himself in desire coaching, orgasmic meditation, sacred sexuality, communal living, and feelings work – all of which he brings to bear in his 1:1 coaching. He also co-hosts an online sexuality group for men wishing to release sexual shame and come into deeper contact with their own authentic desires. Learn more about Devin at https://devingleeson.com/

Intro soundtrack courtesy of Aaron Handford.

Cover Image by Prince Photos

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