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How are you talking to yourself when it comes to your goals?
Need to do versus want to do carry very different energy. Your body perceives the task, goal, or activity very differently depending on word choice.

Should. Need to. Have to.

Believe it or not, it can subconsciously alter your energy for a given task or goal.
And unless you shift that energy, it's, it's always going to feel like a struggle.

Linda unpacks how some of the language we use around our goals points to avoidance. Framing things as "need to" reveals your subconscious feeling about a task and keeps you in the energy of how you'll feel if you don't do it. Which robs you of the energy to DO IT.

Saying " I want to" or "I choose to" calls forth energy.

Once again, this is likely a vestige from our childhood. We use the kind of language we hear growing up and don't question it. But beyond that, there is how childhood is structured.
We're either getting in trouble or, or we're getting a star, but either way we're trying to figure out what the adults want and how we're going to get rewarded and avoid punishment.

This polarity sets up how we view what we need to do. It seems like I have to do it--whether it's " I have to do it this way so is I don't get punished or I have to do it this way to get rewarded.

As kids we take that assignment seriously.
And as kids, we can indicate desire-- I want this and I wanted that and et cetera, et cetera.
But kids don't have the power to get those things, at least not outrightly. So we have to manipulate to get those things, to get our desires met, so to speak.

So it makes sense that the language of I want -- of desire-- got replaced with, language that reflected the value system of the adults around us.

And what happens next? Most of us just grow from that place, but still have that in place. then we create a more sophisticated version of punishment and reward.