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  • 12-Step: your questions answered

    12-Step: your questions answered
    2025/05/09
    In this special episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren and producer Jonathan Price respond to listener-submitted questions about their recent 12-part series on the 12-Step Program. From fear of surrender in Step 1 to doubts about spiritual connection in Step 11 and uncertainty about helping others in Step 12, this conversation is raw, honest, and deeply human.

    Listeners from across the U.S. and beyond wrote in to ask deeply personal questions:
    How do I surrender without giving up on myself?
    What if my moral inventory in Step 4 changes how I see myself?
    How can I make amends without reopening wounds?
    What do I do when God feels distant?
    Can I really help someone else if I’m still healing?
    Bill shares real-world insights and practical, compassionate guidance rooted in decades of therapeutic experience. Jonathan offers encouragement, reframing each question with empathy and hope. The episode ends with a teaser for their next mini-series: exploring four foundational emotions—mad, glad, sad, and scared—and how these emotions interplay with logic, recovery, and identity.
    Whether you’re in recovery or walking alongside someone who is, this episode offers a powerful reminder: you are not alone, and healing is possible.

    ⏱️ Chapter Markers:
    00:00 – Welcome to Blindsight
    00:46 – Letters from Listeners
    02:30 – Shannon (Step 1): Letting Go Without Losing Yourself
    09:45 – Devin (Step 4): Afraid of What I’ll Find
    17:10 – Tasha (Step 9): Making Amends Without Causing Harm
    22:00 – Chris (Step 11): Feeling Spiritually Blocked
    26:45 – Ellie (Step 12): Can I Help While Still Healing?
    31:45 – What’s Next: Mad, Glad, Sad, and Scared
    33:55 – Feedback & Farewell
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    36 分
  • Still Here: A Marine’s Fight to Live Again

    Still Here: A Marine’s Fight to Live Again
    2025/05/01
    In this raw and transformative episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren sits down with Zach Tidwell, a blind Marine Corps veteran, adaptive athlete, software developer, and suicide survivor. Zach shares the deeply personal story of his journey—from a suicide attempt that left him blind and deaf in one ear, to confronting alcoholism, a devastating Huntington’s diagnosis, and ultimately rebuilding a life of resilience and purpose. Through adaptive sports, therapy, coding, and brutal self-honesty, Zach not only survived—he thrived. Zach speaks openly about the critical importance of speaking up, learning healthy coping strategies, asking for help, and embracing your agency in the face of despair. This episode is a must-listen for anyone facing internal battles—or for those supporting someone who is. ⚠️ Content Warning: This episode includes discussion of suicide and addiction. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call 988, and press 1 if you're a veteran. Contact Information: Crisis Line: Dial 988, then press 1 for veterans Aftersight Feedback Line: (720) 712-8856 Email: feedback@aftersight.org Zach Tidwell Website: https://www.zachtidwell.net Podcast: Going in Blind with Zach Tidwell (available on all platforms) Chapter Markers: 00:00 – Welcome to Blindsight 01:05 – Meet Zach Tidwell: Marine, survivor, and adaptive athlete 02:14 – Betrayal, trauma, and the downward spiral 04:38 – Depression, drinking, and suicidal thoughts 06:53 – Surviving a self-inflicted gunshot wound 09:11 – “I’m not making salt and pepper shakers” — reclaiming identity 11:31 – Adaptive sports and rediscovering independence 13:52 – The power of speaking up during the lowest point 16:13 – Why Zach became a blind software developer 18:23 – Relapse and the battle with alcoholism 20:46 – Xanagrams and finding purpose through accessibility 22:45 – Accountability, acceptance, and hard choices 25:03 – The final drink: December 5, 2023 27:26 – The Huntington’s diagnosis and choosing to live intentionally 29:53 – Competing in sports and doing it differently 32:19 – Adapting your world by accepting help 34:39 – VA Blind Rehab Services and veteran resources 36:44 – Suicide prevention hotline and how to get help 38:00 – Zach’s projects, book, and podcast 40:10 – Final thoughts: Growth is painful but worth it
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    42 分
  • Step 12: The Power of Showing Up

    Step 12: The Power of Showing Up
    2025/04/25
    In this heartfelt and grounded episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren wraps up the 12-step series with guest Kevin Petersen, focusing on Step 12 of Alcoholics Anonymous: Having had a spiritual awakening... we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
    Kevin brings clarity, humor, and wisdom to the spiritual and practical sides of Step 12. They unpack what a “spiritual awakening” really looks like—hint: it’s not lightning bolts—and how helping others starts with showing up and being human. This conversation digs deep into humility, relapse, perfectionism, and why stability is the new sexy. Whether you’re in recovery, love someone who is, or just want to live a more honest and connected life, this episode is a gift.

    ⏱️ Chapter Markers
    00:00 – Welcome to Blindsight
    01:00 – Step 12: Reading and breakdown
    02:15 – The circle and triangle: spiritual and technical meaning
    03:50 – Carrying the mess vs. the message
    04:35 – Having a spiritual awakening: what it really means
    06:40 – Humility and helping others (without losing yourself)
    09:20 – “Stability is the new sexy”
    10:55 – What’s the message we carry? (Hint: It’s hope)
    13:00 – Relapse, grace, and compassion in recovery
    15:50 – Why shame doesn’t heal anyone
    17:45 – Perfectionism in the blind and disabled communities
    20:30 – God moments, FaceTime sign language, and awareness
    22:50 – Practicing the principles in all our affairs
    25:15 – Humanity > Perfection
    27:45 – Recovery as a second chance
    30:15 – Final thoughts: Community, flexibility, and finding joy
    32:30 – Feedback invitation and contact info

    📞 Contact Info
    Phone: (720) 712-8856
    Email: feedback@aftersight.org
    Website: aftersight.org
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    34 分
  • Conscious Contact: Prayer, Will, and the 11th Step

    Conscious Contact: Prayer, Will, and the 11th Step
    2025/04/18
    In this deeply reflective episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren and returning guest Joe dive into Step 11 of the 12-Step Program:
    “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.”
    Together, they explore the tension and beauty in surrendering our will, discuss the spiritual ambiguity many newcomers wrestle with, and unpack the core purpose of prayer and meditation in recovery—not as a way to get what we want, but to align ourselves with something far more trustworthy: God’s will. With honesty and care, the conversation touches on religious trauma, the fluidity of the "higher power" concept, and the sacred act of showing up each morning and simply asking.
    Bill and Joe also unpack the Prayer of St. Francis, the importance of not running the show, and why taking it easy isn’t laziness—it’s wisdom.

    ⏱️ Chapter Markers:
    00:00 – Welcome to Blindsight
    01:15 – What is Step 11?
    02:15 – Joe’s background with God entering recovery
    04:00 – Religious trauma and spiritual abuse
    06:30 – Higher Power vs “God” terminology
    07:45 – Bill W, Carl Jung, and Benedictine roots
    09:15 – “Upon awakening…” – morning meditation guidance
    12:30 – Asking for freedom from self-will
    13:50 – “Take it easy” and the myth of urgency
    14:30 – Ambition, success, and God’s will
    17:00 – Suffering, Job, and the mystery of evil
    19:00 – The Prayer of St. Francis
    21:30 – Self-care vs. helping others
    23:00 – The trap of codependency and false humility
    26:30 – The train-and-candle metaphor
    28:15 – Richard Rohr, atheism, and a hostile universe
    30:00 – Drops of God: how to seek and notice
    31:50 – Final thoughts: “Keep coming back. It works.”

    📞 Contact Us
    Got feedback? Questions? Want to share your story?
    📧 Email: feedback@aftersight.org
    📞 Call/Text: 720-712-8856
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    33 分
  • Step 10: When Being Right Feels Wrong

    Step 10: When Being Right Feels Wrong
    2025/04/11
    In this raw and thoughtful episode of Blindsight, Bill Lundgren sits down with Joe, a longtime friend and retired physician who brings 34 years of personal recovery experience to the mic. Together, they dive into Step 10 of the 12-step program: “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.” But as Joe reveals, it’s not always about being wrong. Sometimes, it’s about being right—and still needing to take a step back. This episode unpacks the tricky territory of righteous anger, resentment, and the danger of spiritual pride, especially in a world full of division and injustice. Joe opens up about the personal coal of unresolved bitterness and how Step 10 keeps him grounded, honest, and able to maintain serenity. From real-time reflections on political outrage to resisting hatred when you feel justified, this conversation is a must-hear for anyone striving to stay clean, sober, and spiritually awake in a chaotic world.

    Chapter Markers:
    00:00 – Intro: Time to Fight. Time to Thrive.
    01:30 – What is Step 10 and why does it matter now?
    04:00 – Righteous anger and how it steals serenity
    07:15 – Resentment disguised as justice
    10:00 – A personal example: healthcare rage and assassination
    13:45 – When resentment turns into internal damage
    16:30 – The difference between hopelessness and serenity
    18:45 – Anger vs. Resentment: Why addicts must pause
    21:00 – Maintaining relationships across divides
    24:00 – The challenge of taking a kindly view of everyone
    27:30 – Walking away without severing ties
    30:00 – Resentment, prevention, and avoiding future amends
    32:30 – Choosing peace over being right
    34:00 – Final thoughts and hope for those still fighting

    Contact Info:
    📞 Feedback line: (720) 712-8865
    📧 Email: feedback@aftersight.org
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    37 分
  • Step Nine: Making Amends with Courage and Clarity

    Step Nine: Making Amends with Courage and Clarity
    2025/04/04
    In this powerful episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren is joined by Kevin Peterson, a counselor, author, and long-time advocate for mental health and recovery. Together, they unpack Step Nine of the 12 Steps: "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
    Kevin shares deeply personal and emotional stories about the power of taking full responsibility for the harm we’ve caused — not just through apologies, but through real amends. He explains the technical process of Step Nine (including four key questions), the spiritual courage it takes to show up in person, and the role your Higher Power plays in facilitating healing and reconciliation.
    Listeners will gain insights into the difference between guilt and accountability, how to avoid further harm in the process, and why this step is a true marker of maturity in recovery. Whether you’re in a 12-step program or simply navigating a journey of healing and growth, Kevin’s candid storytelling and grounded wisdom will move you.
    He’ll be back next week to go even deeper—so stay tuned.

    ⏱️ Chapter Markers:
    00:00 – Opening and Welcome: Mental health and the journey through the 12 Steps
    01:10 – Kevin Peterson’s sobriety journey and introduction to Step 9
    02:20 – Step 4 and 9: Where people tend to drop out
    03:30 – Technical vs. Spiritual: Understanding Step 9’s dual nature
    04:45 – How to identify who to make amends to
    05:30 – The 4 components of making amends
    07:00 – The difference between apology and amends
    08:20 – Doing it in person and trusting your Higher Power
    09:30 – Emotional impact stories: Lost relationship
    11:30 – Story of financial harm and deeper consequences
    13:50 – Real accountability and taking ownership
    15:00 – Turning it over to your Higher Power
    16:30 – Facing legal risks in the amends process
    17:50 – Al-Anon, honesty, and being tested in the process
    18:30 – Big or small, all amends matter
    19:30 – Step 9 as a maturity marker in recovery
    21:00 – How to handle amends that could harm others
    22:40 – Final thoughts: Step 9 separates adults from children in recovery
    23:30 – Closing and feedback information
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    25 分
  • Amends Begin With Willingness

    Amends Begin With Willingness
    2025/03/28
    In this episode of Blindsight, host Bill Lundgren continues the journey through the 12-step program, diving into Step Eight: "Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all." Returning guest Jeff Schlund from the Betty Ford Center shares honest and heartfelt reflections on what it means to be ready to make amends—and how this step was a turning point in his own recovery.
    They discuss how memory, humility, and fear all play roles in the process, and why putting ourselves on the list of those we’ve harmed might be one of the most overlooked yet healing parts of the journey. Jeff shares his story of relapse and resilience, and how step eight helped him discover a deeper sense of accountability, hope, and empowerment.

    ⏱️ Chapter Markers:
    00:00 – Introduction to Step Eight
    02:24 – Jeff’s recovery story and Betty Ford experience
    04:45 – The evolving list of people harmed
    07:09 – Making amends to yourself
    09:29 – The danger of unchecked guilt
    11:07 – Step Eight is not a race
    14:45 – The difference between amends and apology
    18:38 – Accepting outcomes when making amends
    20:40 – Jumping ahead to Step Nine too soon
    22:18 – The importance of readiness and memory
    24:24 – Jeff's personal turning point
    27:59 – Real support from others in recovery
    30:22 – The roots of the program and real change
    32:31 – Surrender and serious recovery
    34:42 – Relief and empowerment from willingness
    36:16 – “The only thing you have to change is everything”
    38:14 – Closing thoughts and next episode preview

    📱 Contact Info:
    We’d love your feedback!
    📞 Call us: 720-712-8856
    📧 Email us: feedback@aftersight.org
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    41 分
  • Step Seven: Shedding Shortcomings, Embracing Growth

    Step Seven: Shedding Shortcomings, Embracing Growth
    2025/03/21
    In this episode of Blindsight, we continue our journey through the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, focusing on Step Seven: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Host Bill Lundgren welcomes back Jeff Shlund, who started our series with Step One, to break down the meaning and personal impact of this step. They discuss the role of humility, self-awareness, and seeking support in overcoming personal flaws. The conversation explores how Step Seven applies beyond addiction, including in the blindness community, and why progress—not perfection—is the key to growth.

    Chapter Markers:
    ⏱ 00:00 – Welcome to Blindsight
    ⏱ 02:23 – Understanding Step Seven: Asking for help in recovery
    ⏱ 04:18 – The Seventh Step Prayer and its impact on daily life
    ⏱ 06:33 – Recognizing personal shortcomings and seeking growth
    ⏱ 08:37 – The power of self-awareness in the recovery process
    ⏱ 11:01 – Seeking professional help: Therapy, medication, and sponsors
    ⏱ 15:44 – Breaking the stigma: Medication in recovery
    ⏱ 18:03 – Building a strong support system
    ⏱ 22:02 – Applying Step Seven beyond addiction
    ⏱ 24:26 – Step Seven in the blindness community
    ⏱ 26:13 – Growth, self-acceptance, and lifelong progress
    ⏱ 28:40 – Revisiting earlier steps for deeper healing
    ⏱ 31:21 – Working the steps at your own pace
    ⏱ 33:25 – Final thoughts: Accepting ourselves while striving to improve
    ⏱ 35:26 – Closing remarks & listener feedback

    Key Takeaways:
    ✅ Step Seven teaches humility—asking a higher power to help remove shortcomings.
    ✅ Higher Power is personal and can take different forms for different people.
    ✅ Professional help (therapy, medication) is valuable and not a sign of failure.
    ✅ Recovery isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress and daily growth.

    Listener Feedback & Contact:
    📞 Blindsight Hotline: (720) 712-8856
    📩 Email: feedback@aftersight.org
    We’d love to hear your thoughts on this episode! Have questions or suggestions for future topics? Get in touch!
    🎧 Join us next week for Step Eight: Making Amends.
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    37 分